If Ninjas came in...

I know I know, I'm writing this way late. I suck. It was a long night, and tips sucked. I also didn't have a chance to sleep all day Saturday, so I've now been awake since Friday night.

First was a very very strung out dude nodding out in the back seat from Breathless to the Center Bar in Carteret. He un-intentionally tipped me as he thrust a wad of bills at me.

Some dude went from Chrome to work at C&S on Blair.

An older woman and 2 teenage guys from St. James church to Port Reading. I pulled up to the house and passed the driveway by about 5 feet. (Only because they didn't tell me which house was theirs until we were passing it. People give you an address sometimes and immediately expect you to usher them to their doorstep, whether the house even has a number on it or not.) So now the kid keeps looking at me and saying the house number over and over again in a panicked voice. So I point at the house and say "yes there it is." I guess he expects me to pull up to the doorway or something. So I back up 2 feet and finally they get out. OK.

Then Dannys me to pick up Pathmark in Avenel. On my way he switches me with someone and says get the Loop instead. I guess the driver that was there didn't want to take the fare to Newark. I pulled up and (after a small argument with the security guards at the desk) find the fare they say they want to go to Newark Penn. Which is really easy to get to. But then they decide it's too expensive so they want to go to Rahway train instead. The Loop Motel must be a pretty crazy place because they have a gated entrance & handcuff toting desk clerks.

Washington Ave Carteret to West Park in Avenel. This guy is a regular back and forth from the house in Avenel. Some strange people come and go from that place.

7-11 Byron. He goes to the C&S warehouse. There are no trucks to unload tonight and he's pissed he spent the money to go to work for nothing.

Steve W a driver goes from work to the Tropical Bar, but then he decides it's too crowded in there, so he goes to Cancun instead.

Wegmans to Taco Bell. When I get to Taco Bell I see a dude playing with a kitten in the parking lot. It runs off and I see it's a dumpster cat. I stop to talk to him and he tells me he thinks it's injured. Either it had blood or ketchup all over it's head. We talk about it for a moment, and he heads off in search of it again.

Judy goes home from the REO.

Back to the REO. Some guy is going to Flynn funeral home. I have no idea why he's going here, it's 12:30 in the morning, and I don't think I want to know why.

Danny goes to the City Tavern.

The Legion supposedly 2 fares there. The bartender tells me the other guy wants to stop at Quick Check. I figure yeah it's slow, why not. His fare is $4.50 and when we finally get to his house he tells me he only has $2. Wonderful. I take it & throw him out. Back to the Legion for the bartender. He gets home without incident.

Chicken Galore to Carteret. I don't know why it takes those guys 3 plus hours to close up the shop & get out. I've done similar food service and never stayed longer than an hour after close time.

City Tavern to the Comfort Inn, a drunken fool of a business guy. He wants to stop for cigarettes, and keeps threatening to puke in my car. I tell him that I'd rather he didn't as this will make me puke, and then I'll have to clean up 2 people's puke and that isn't fair. We get there and he throws a $20 bill at me (his fare is $6.50) and runs out of the cab to puke. I yelled after him to make sure he drinks some water before he passes out.

Kevin the Indian stripper lover goes from Breathless home.

Coreja Ave in Iselin is going to Queens with a stop in Union City. Tim assures me that they speak English, and know where they are going. Wrong and wrong. No English, and they can't tell me a thing. So I get Tim on the horn, and he's able to give me a decent route. So off to Union City to drop the first chick off. Unlike the Blondie song this place is neither Blue nor in English. It's like Perth Amboy time 50. Every street is like Smith Street. Tons of spanish stores, and a light at every corner. Next through the Lincoln Tunnel, down 42nd street in search of the Queens Midtown Tunnel. I did see a video being filmed, though I couldn't tell who it was the cameraman was right in front of her, they were filming in a car. (Kind of looked like Britney though ::sigh::) I sort of get to the area this broad is going to, and she is grunting and pointing. Turns out she's pointing in the wrong direction. She's yelling at me in the only English she knows "103 Corona 103 Corona 103 Corona" Yes lady I know that's where you are going! Tim helps me turn around and find the place. And I toss her out. On my way back through the city I come across the largest collection of cops I have ever seen. In front of the Garden entrance to Penn Station, there are about (no joke) 1000 cops justt milling about. As I'm driving through this I'm describing the scene to Tim on the phone... maybe I should get off my cell phone while I'm driving through this many cops huh?

REO diner goes home from work to the Hollywood motel. She's amazingly hyper for 5am.

And finally a goes from Hopelawn to the airport. I have a hard time convincing him to come with me as he has called a limo service, but they passed the call on to us without him knowing it.

Finally I can go home and sleep!!

So Sorry...

Sorry I haven't been updating guys. It's not that I'm ignoring you, I just haven't been in work very much. I've worked like 3 hours since my last post, and nothing really happened in those 3 hours. I really haven't been doing very well with these daytime hours. I miss nights really bad.

So last night sucked! First of all 5 of my 7 fares were so wasted they couldn't speak. Which normally would be a good thing, except for the fact that they tried to anyway. So I got a whole lot of "shrrarreaarrmmmmfmfmf".

First is Charlies Angels to Meinzer in Avenel. I've dropped this guy off at strip clubs before, but never had the pleasure of retrieving him. Guess I was lucky up till now.

Next. Howie. Drunk. I've never seen him this bad. He fell out the door of the bar. Stumbled into the van, and then fell out upon arrival at his house. He kept mumbling something about his Fitzgerald. Some guy he's in love with. I believe this is where Howie picked up his hiv.

JR's some couple from Stroudsberg PA. They kept calling saying they were at RJ's big difference. So when I got them in the car I explained the difference. Poor folks there were 2 old people sitting in there with them otherwise the place was empty. Someone told them to go to the Lemon Tree, but they didn't know where it was. (2 blocks away) They would have had a much better time. The guy said something I haven't heard in years. When I mentioned I used to live in Westchester, he said "Come in High & leave Gay" I had forgotten all about that joke. Ahh good old Westchester.

In between all these I spent plenty of time sitting in the office.

Carmine sends me to the train to get someone who will be pulling in any minute. I get there and Greg is passed out in his car. So I pull up in front of him, and wait 20 minutes while the train is late. Finally some frat boys come off of it carrying a giant blow up penis. Great. Then they walk completely around the van to Greg's car and bang on the window to wake him. Fine. Fuck 'em.

Head over to some apartments I didn't know existed at the end of McFarland, and pick up the dude from Woodbridge Village who used to go to Bunns Lane. He kept telling me how great the band that played Friday night at Jammers was. "They played all the hits, Steely Dan, & The Allman brothers and everything!!" Jeez can't believe I missed it. http://launch.yahoo.com/lc/?rt=0&rp1=0&rp2=1214631305 This is my personal radio station, trust me you won't find any Steely Dan on it.

Next the Main Tavern. Going to St. James in Woodbridge. He flipped when he heard the fare was $5. He says "what are we in a fucking depression?" So I say "Well at $2 a gallon of gas, pretty much yeah." He tells me it's coming out of my tip. Whatever dude. So he gives me a $2 tip & says "there would have been $3 more for you, but your dispatcher took it out of your pocket." So I guess he expected to go for $2. Yeah ok.

Plaza Drive an Indian broad going to Fiat in Iselin. She didn't tip. But she was mercifully quiet. That's tip in itself.

There is a van call to go to the airport at 5:45 at Sharon Gardens. I get there about 10 minutes early. Just in case they come out early. At 5:40 he comes out & tells me 10 minutes. I tell him waiting time starts at 5:45. So they take their sweet ass time coming out bringing 1 suitcase at a time. While I am waiting Carmine tells me that there is a group at the airport that will be going to Princeton for $105. This will definitely save my night. So next time I see the guy I ask him if he's almost ready I have to pick somebody else up & they are waiting. He says "Well our appt. WAS at 5:45 and you got here at 25 of." And? That's all the more reason you should be ready by now 5:56. Douche. Finally at 6:05 they get in the car and I tell them there is 20 minutes worth of waiting charge. The woman says "Oh no, he gave me a flat fee, and all I pay is $50. I told him we'd take time to load up, and he said that was no problem yesterday." I'm trying to stay calm, really I am. So I tell her he probably figured she meant like 5 minutes, and we can't eat 20 minutes worth of loading time. She wasn't happy. So I finally get them out of the van at the airport, and head off in search of these Princetonites. Now friggin Carmine didn't bother to get a phone number for them or even which door they were standing at. All he tells me is it's a woman wearing a black skirt at Continental. Great. I drove around that fucking airport for 50 minutes these people were nowhere to be found. I know they were waiting a while but I was definitely there within a 1/2 hour of their call. Dammit. I needed that call, aside from the near hour I lost searching for them. I ended up only booking $86 in 7 hours.

Then I decided Fuck you guys, I'm goin home. I'm gonna have to go in early tonight. So you should be hearing from me again soon.

I love Sundays!

I did pretty decently last night pulling $70 in tips on a $265 book. Tim was dispatching when I got there, then I left for the hour or so to watch 6 Feet Under with my mother, and carmello was there when I got back. Tim should be on the next 2 Sundays though Carmello needs off.

First call was Michael court to Carteret. The kid talked to me like we were best friends who haven't seen each other in years.

While I had him in the car, Tim called my cell and told me to jump on the Turnpike and go to the Marriott in Raritan Center. I get there, and it's 2 woman and one of their daughters going into NY to see Chicago. It's now 5:50 and the show starts at 6:30. They asked me if they could make it. I answered "no." Plain and simple there was no way. They seemed pretty cool with that, and we set off. They were really sweet middle america type people. I managed to get them there by 6:45 and they were happy. They asked me if we could come back and pick them up, and I told them "Look, we can come pick you up for another $100, but you are nice people and I'll be honest with you, when you come out, there will be cabs here jump in one to Penn station and take the train back to Woodbridge. It'll only cost like $20 that way, and we'll pick you up there." So I guess that's what they did. I heard later that they called but kept missing stops (I have no idea how) and we eventually got them in Edison.

I got a welfarian that goes from Perth Amboy to Avenel every day. She wanted me to stop at a liquor store for her. They always want all this extra shit, and it's not like they ever tip or anything. C'mon people you are getting this ride for free. How much more do you want? Since I cleared right there, I just went right over to my mothers.

A couple from LA goes from Walgreens to the Hilton. I don't know how they ended up at Walgreens with all their suitcases.

Hilton to Fridays. This guy was a total jerk. I can't quite explain how, he just was. He called later and gave Carmello a bunch of shit cause he was drunk. So Carmello left him there, and we didn't pick him back up.

New Brunswick Ave to Port Reading. When I stopped in front of his house some guy behind me almost hit me cause he was FLYING up this little residential street. He had plenty of room to go around me but didn't have time due to his speed. Then he was pissed at me. OK.

The bartender from the Legion went from the REO to Carteret, on the way I grabbed a woman from the Development Center also. He was uneventful, she insisted she was only paying $8 since that's what Carmine charged her last night. She is a regular, and normally pays $10, but now all the sudden she wants $8 all the time since Carmine is an idiot and fucked up. Great.

I was sitting in the office while a newer driver came in to book out. He turns to me and pretty much demands I "run him around the block". Then he can't tell me where the hell he's going. He keeps saying "by Main Street" when I keep asking him what that means he gets all pissy, and says the Main Tavern. Why he couldn't say that to begin with is beyond me.

Then I take a hooker from the Gem motel back to Elizabeth. She didn't say she was a hooker, but she says when she gets in the car, "I don't like coming this far away, I get scared ya know?" Plus I dropped her off on a corner with a bunch of other girls. Do what ya gotta do lady.

The Markowitz guy goes to work.

Danny goes home to the Star.

I pick up a Mexican dude on Minna and take him to a bar in Perth Amboy, he keeps asking me if I'm married, and if I have any "babies". I have picked him up before, and he always asks the same questions. On the way I grabbed a guy out of the City Tavern, and dropped him in Fords.

My stripper from Breathless goes home to Port Reading. It's always a nonstop tirade of bitching the whole ride, this time about how her boyfriend is cheating on her. She used my cell to call his when we got there to ask him to come down and help her carry stuff in the house. He didn't answer, and later on that night I got a missed call from that number. I'm waiting for another phone call from her soon flipping out and asking me why I'm calling her boyfriend. I guarantee you she forgot she used my phone to call him and called the number to find out who it was. (I have Britany Spears on my voice mail she must have loved that!)

A case of beer and a pack of cigarettes to the Mexicans. While I'm standing in the bar pulling the beer out of the cooler, the bartender walks by me and I guess he was going to poke my stomach, but somehow he "tripped" and grabbed my boob to catch himself. He's like "Oops sorry". Yeah ok dude. Thanks.

1 1/2 hours in the office reading a book and listening to Tommy & Chris talk at the top of their voices. They also lost a bunch of money to Carmello playing poker.

Last official call is a family of 6 to the airport in the van. I piled all of the luggage in, and they go to get in only to find out the doors don't open. Apparently the van was in an accident last week, and they haven't bothered to fix it. I had no idea. So the whole family had to climb in for the other side, I apologized my ass off, and they seemed ok. I drove nice & safe & slow, pulled them right up to the curb, and dragged all the bags out again for them. It payed off though, they tipped me $25. Woo Hoo.

Then I got gas and drove Tommy home. The bastard didn't even bother to offer anything when I got there. We don't get charged to ride, but it's only courtesy to give the driver something for their time. Bastard, it's not like he lives right on Main Street, he live in freakin Metuchin. Oh Well.

Finally time to go home yayy!

3 cars 4 calls

Sorry I haven't written in a while, I didn't go to work much this week. I've been feeling like shit. Switching shifts is killing me. I miss the nights a lot.

So the first call I took was this guy from Seattle going from the Sheraton to Newark. He was pretty darn cool, and tipped well. Very nice, He kept telling me to make sure I marry for money. It was a fun ride.

Then I rush back to switch into the crappy van for a 2:30 appt. These indians finally come out at 10 to 3, and expect me to load all of their 100 lb. bags into the van. Bastards. This is the trip from HELL. The stupid terror warning has all the bridges & tunnels all blocked up for "security". This makes it a 4 hour trip. 2 hours each way. No air conditioning. Thankfully it's like October weather, or this would have been cause to jump off of one of said bridges. Radio is broken as well. I don't think I got over 40 mph the entire trip. So we get there, I lug all of the bags out of the car, and I tell them it's $111 with the tolls. Can you believe this indian dude actually pulls $111 out of his pocket hands it to me a starts to walk away?!? I have never said anything to a fare ever about having to tip, but I freaked out on this one. I told him they made me wait almost a half hour, I sat in all that traffic, I won't get back for at least 2 hours, and lugged their bags and I'll be goddamned if they think they aren't going to tip me. So he holds out a $5 bill, I grabbed it, slammed the door, and took off. Fuckers.

I didn't get back to the office until 7:00 so I ate something.

CVS to the mall. 2 asian lesbians. They talked in chinese or something the whole way.

Then back to the office.

Liberty Tavern to Bristol Arms up by Metro. He was a drunken mess telling me all about his DUI and asking my opinion. I don't know what to tell you dude. Then he tips me $10 and insists on giving me his phone number. He never even told me his name. Whatever.

I got gas and decided to leave it at that. I might go in tomorrow. Maybe not. Depends how I feel tomorrow.